Cut off & Craigslist.
“Ok, I am separating our joint checking account if a dairy cow even comes close to this farm,” says my very approving husband- as if that threat would stop me anyways from purchasing this life changing dairy cow. I grew up on a grain farm in Midwest Minnesota, but I wasn’t the average ‘live for the county fair type’ farm kid. No, I was seriously obsessed with..
COWS. It was a physical being that always grounded me and followed me through high school and college…
Not to mention my engagement…
And the children…
Which leads me here. To this milking stanchion, on a 5 gallon pail either shivering or swatting mosquitos. Exactly where I want to be.
My girl Brie didn’t come to our farm without a fight though, cough husband cough. Dairy has this stigma, I don’t know how to not offend when I say this- denim overalls and Old McDonald, which is exactly what my husband did not want to take to his grave with him. We had a few beef cattle, nothing serious mind you, they served their purpose but didn’t get me that ‘pet’ like fix I had grown to love with my 4H animals. At this point I’d been following Shaye with theelliotthomestead.com for about a year on her blog and YouTube channel and gall darn it I wanted to be her. She had such a way story telling about the hardships, simplicity, farm food cooking, homemaking and glorifying this dairy cow of hers. She referred to the dairy animals as queens of the farm for providing them with such a rich indulgance of milk and cream. AND frick, I wanted that.
Craigslist here I come! 4.5 hours away from my house was an ad for this beautiful dairy cow named Brie that was listed, “Great for a 4H or small family farm that wanted to start milking.” This was fate! This was Jesus! This was MINE! Like all good wives, I wait to bring up the wants and wishes to my husband at bedtime (I’ve been married 3 years, I know how to redeem myself). He wasn’t buying it, therefore neither was I. 2 months later, I happened to be going somewhere within an hour of her and she was still on Craigslist. I was buying her.
He took his pickup to work that morning. His plan to paralyze me from leaving backfired as I dug around the garage and found a spare ball hitch. 5 minutes later the trailer was hooked up to my Ford Expedition SUV- I was going to get that cow and I was bringing hell right along with me. The trailers tabs were expired nothing short of 10 years. I proved it is possible to drive through a Metropolitan area without brake, blinker or any lights for that matter. And God forbid I would need to unhook, because the trailer jack was snapped off, but my car jack could do the trick right?
I pulled into this picturesque farm, you know the Old McDonald type that I crave. Chickens roamed the yard, goats frolicked about chewing up trouble and there was my gal awaiting my arrival. After a brief milking lesson, she was loaded. I was a homesteader.
The brakes went out on my car about an hour away from home. Luckily my neighbor drove by coming home from his cabin with his pickup so he pulled the trailer. I prayed and kept distance. As for my husband- he was sure to be there for my first milking to publish all my frustration and swearing to the SnapChat world. That my friend is how good marriages work. The end and God bless the dairy farmers!
